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Tuesday, November 22, 2005

...when you're not strong

What do you do when someone you love hurts you?

Do you scream? Do you cry? Do you punch the wall? Vent to a friend? Go for a drive? Blog?

Do you say hurtful things? Or do you hold it all in?

I am prone to saying hurtful things. If not to your face, then definitely behind your back. But it will usually be to your face. And then some more behind your back.

But today I held it in. I held it in because I wanted to think that this person didn't really mean what they said to me. I wanted to think that this person only said these things to me out of their own pain.

But it still hurt me.

And today, for the first time in a long time, I wished that my husband was here to hug me and make it all better.

I usually do just fine, all on my own. I've been strong. I've been independent. And I've even learned how to lean on my friends, every so often, whenever I lose my balance.

But I could really go for just one DJ hug right now. A good tight one to carry me over for another 3 years or so.

posted by The Merry Widow at 11:34 PM |


Commented by Anonymous Jade:

For soulmates we spend a laughable amount of time together. Lucky for you, I'll be in Houston this weekend (you know who you can get my number from, he has my permission to give it to you if you don't have it already). Also, what are your thanksgiving plans?

Also, remember when you told me we should go have drinks? Well I'm taking you up on that. I have something to celebrate ;).

November 23, 2005 12:57 AM 
Commented by Anonymous Nilla:

Let's see. I'll say it to your face, behind your back, and I'll probably hit things, or even you.

How nice of me. And I can sort of commiserate with how it feels to not have your partner to learn on. It sucks.

November 23, 2005 8:20 AM 
Commented by Blogger Pissy Britches:

When you have a husband you just yell and say hurtful things to them.
It all equals out.

November 23, 2005 10:57 AM 
Commented by Blogger Big Heavy:

people are usually afraid to tell me hurtful things, but i usually make a face and hold it in.

i'd hug the stuffin' out of ya.

November 23, 2005 3:05 PM 
Commented by Blogger Big Heavy:

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

November 23, 2005 3:05 PM 
Commented by Blogger Freebird:

I'm sorry someone hurt your feelings. :-( Cheer up. You're the Merry Widow remember?

November 23, 2005 7:15 PM 
Commented by Anonymous debutaunt:

I tell my friends. And then my friends kick their ass for hurting my feelings.

You know I got your back, girl. Even with leukemia, I'd cut them for ya!


November 25, 2005 6:46 AM 
Commented by Anonymous Amanda B.:

Aw sweetie. I wish I could say something funny or at least smart-assed to make you laugh. I'm just too touched by this post at the moment.

December 20, 2005 12:36 AM 

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