So as long as I can remember, my right eye has constantly watered. All the time. Non-stop. 24-7. Like it's always crying a river. Literally. My right eye has cried a river's worth of tears. In fact my eye is tearing right now, as I type this. But just my right eye.
So for a long time I thought that my eye was watering because I was always outside, in the cold wind. Yes, I thought it was weird that only my right eye would water, but it seemed like a reasonable explanation at the time. Then, as years passed, and the wind died down, I thought that perhaps my right eye was more sensitive to allergens than the left eye and maybe that's why it was always tearing. But then the wonderful drug, allegra
, was invented and even though I eat that stuff like it's chicken fried rice (yummy) my right eye still hasn't stopped watering.
Anywho, I finally broke down and went to see an Ophthamologist today so that she could fix my damn eye and it would stop watering and I could start wearing eye shadow on that eye again and looking symmetrically fabulous.
And after what seemed like 800 puffs of air shot into each eye ("to test the pressure of your eyes,") and 12 million hours of staring into a light that is 10 to the nth times brighter than the sun, the doctor turned to me (at least I think she turned to me...I could only see white light at that point of my visit) and said, "Well, from what I can tell, your tear ducts do not seem clogged. Why don't you try using these tear drops for the next 3 weeks and then come back. If the drops haven't helped, then we're gonna have to probe your lacrimal duct to see if there's blockage." PROBE MY LACRIMAL DUCT??? WTF??? Basically, Dr. Evil wants to rotor-rooter my tear duct. I guess those 4 years of evil medical school are finally paying off for her.
So now I have visions (ha! pun intended) of me having to go through this:
and also this:
Just so I can end up with eyes like these.
Perhaps this lady:
And also this lady:
Should consider having the same procedure done.
Go Ahead, Share Your Thoughts! .